Stop Forcing. Start Leading with Engagement

Stop Forcing. Start Leading with Engagement
As a leader in your business or in a company, your role is to have a vision and to be convinced with it, so you would be able to communicate it to others in a way that they could see a possibility for their dreams through it.
The question here is how well you do it? Your answer to this question will define your leadership style.
Influencing others by authority, control or command is already proved to produce limited outcomes while new model – influencing others by engagement and enrolment is gaining momentum.

What about you? Are you helping your employees visualise their personal goals aligned with the business goals or sending to their subconscious mind fear and uncertainty?

Influencing others does not mean you tell others what you want them to do. It is about being able to move things forward without pushing, forcing or telling others what to do. It begins with understanding yourself, the way you behave or communicate then the effect or impact you have on others.

Sometimes, you can get so used to your own personal style or the way of being or pattern of communicating, that you do not think of how it is being received.

People when they feel being understood, acknowledged or appreciated, they will move things forward easily in a team environment. This happens through effective communication. That is a two-way street, which involves saying what you have to say and willing to listen to others’ saying.

To be powerful with your leadership you must take responsibility for your communication with others. It would be very powerful when you come from a creation not a reaction in your style. That requires being present to what is said at that moment.

Moreover, to get others engaged and enrolled in your communication you first seek to understand others then to be understood. Unfortunately, most people do not listen with the intend to understand other persons point of view and his/her world. They listen with the intent to filtering everything through their own paradigms. This shatters communication and feeds fear in others.

As an influencing leader you become an example to others by holding an integrity and a responsibility for your listening as much as your words. Once you do that, you would not feel a need in your communication to protect, control or avoid certain conversations which will create a space for others to be who they are.

To be effective in your communication therefore, in your leadership;

  • Stop fixing people instead appreciate their contributions and significance. Find out where and how you can help them to be engaged, cultivate a culture of having open and transparent communication with each other.
  • Ask questions. This is an excellent way to initiate communication because it shows other people that you are paying attention and interested in their response.
  • Check their perception. It is an effort to understand the feelings behind the words.
  • Observe their actions without value judgments, and without making accusations or generalizations about motives, attitudes, or personalities. Otherwise, you may unintentionally trigger others ego that you might not want to happen.
  • Give constructive feedback regardless of positive or negative one. Always use sincere praise whenever possible to create a more constructive atmosphere. When giving negative feedback make it privately, without anger or personal attack that does not cause others become defensive.

Halle Yilmaz is a financial adviser ,business consultant and mentor. As a business consultant she works with business owners and leaders on their culture and performance optimisation in their organisations. She uses very effective tools to help leaders and teams create deep emotional engagement and profitable business results.


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